My boyfriend picked me up at my house, i left with him in his car and he asked where i wanted to go. I said i wanted to go to his house because i wanted to talk to him and show him something. We went up to him room and i sat on the bed, i think he went to the bathroom and then came back. Then i talked about how i was feeling, i felt rushed, i felt pressured to be perfect, i felt scared, all the feelings i feel in real life with my life. I got up off the bed and told him to sit down. I then unbuttoned my pants and he got excited because he's a guy i guess. I was wearing a really long shirt that covered my my legs when i took my pants off. Then i lifted up my my shirt to show my hips and all the cuts i made on them. He seemed upset and then he stood up and punched me in the face, threw me on the bed and pulled my hair while he sat on top of me making me pled and beg him to believe that i wasn't going to do it again. Then he tried to rape me and i ran out the door and outside in my undies. I ran down the road while he chased me and then i ran into the woods and the went back in time to a time where i didn't tell him. I was wearing shorts and a t-shirt and we were hiking in the woods. I sat down and he noticed a cut on my leg where my shorts didn't cover. He pushed my shorts up and found more. He looked at me like he was going to cry and i jumped up and ran until i hit a river. I jumped on the stones in the river that were sticking up and then sat on a large flat stone and watched him race towards me. Then the scene changed and i was sitting in his bathroom with my back against the door. He was knocking on the door and asking if i was okay. I took out a sheet of paper and a pen that i had in my pants pocket and i wrote, "I'm not okay, i need help" on it it and slid it under the door. Then i woke up feeling really upset.

I know what this dream means, i cut my hips up with a knife because i'm struggling with self injury and i have yet to tell my boyfriend. I know I need to tell him but i'm just afraid of how he'll react. I'm pretty sure he wont beat me up and i think that's just fear talking and i don't know what to do. i think this dream is just playing out all the different scenarios. I think there were more but i don't remember them anymore.

I think you are right.

Can you speak to someone who has had a similar experience with self injury and ask them what they did?

Or maybe you could speak to someone who has had a girlfriend who cut herself and ask how he felt?

You say you are "pretty sure" that he wouldn't beat you up? Is he the kind of person that would even possibly beat you up. It's hard to tell what you mean by "pretty sure". It's OK if he beats you up and rapes you in a dream because it is only a dream but you shouldn't be in a relationship with anyone if there is even the slightest possiblity that he would do something like this in waking life.

I flat out told him last night and he was fine with it, it didn't go anything like my dream, i know he would never hit me or hurt me, i'm just letting fear tell me lies. He never hit me or raped me before or even said anything like that, he's a mellow person so i don't know why i thought that. He was okay with it because he knows other people that do it and he had to deal with it before and i knew when i told other people about this they got really mad, especially my last boyfriend and he hurt me so maybe that's why i thought this one would.

it maybe time to get help cutting youself or even causing self harm is not safe work with your boyfriend and find new ways of relieving stress. i'm pretty sure he can find a few ways.

I'm glad it all worked out.

I agree with Aader you should get help about cutting yourself, or maybe you already are?

Also, even though your boyfriend seems great from what you said, since your last boyfriend hurt you, sometimes people get into patterns where they keep finding themselves with people who hurt them, because that is what they are used to dealing with, so just be careful. If you are getting help about cutting yourself, as Aader suggested, I think you should also get help about that, too.